On the way home from our morning errands, we stopped at a new flea market along the roadside not too far from our little town.  There was a vintage coca cola cooler that I wanted to check out.  I have wanted one of these practically my entire life, but they are usually priced beyond my junkin’ budget. 

We pulled into the parking lot and I swear there were golden rays of heaven shining down on all its glory.  I had to shoo away the angels to get a closer look at its rusty and worn patina.  Even the lids were still attached, a rarity on these old pieces.  I couldn’t believe the seller was asking so little for it.

We bought it and then headed home to get the truck.

When it was delivered, I hopped off the mower and instructed them where I wanted it, right in front of the house, center the windows.  I went back to mowing while the guys unloaded it from the truck.

About half an hour later, I wandered over to my new glorious treasure.

I happy sighed.

Then I kind of choked on my breath.

Wait.

Didn’t this thing have BOTH lids?

Yes, it did.

I look in the bed of the truck.

No, not there.

I look inside the cooler.

No, not there.

I holler to who shall remain anonymous. 

Well, let’s give him a name, just for the sake of the story.

Let’s pick some random name, like say,

Dumb Donkey Butt, or a synonym there of.

Let’s refer to him as DDB, not to be confused with SJA.

Anyway, I holler to DDB,

Didn’t this thing have BOTH lids?

DDB’s chin dropped to his chest.

Yes, it did.

You didn’t secure the lids before you went ripping down the highway, did you?

No. I am sooooooo sorry.

I was so angry,
I just turned around and hopped back on my mower.

Mowing has always been therapy for me,
but this is the first time I have ever anger mowed.
I fought with that mower for two more hours.
I cannot even begin to tell you how sore my neck and shoulders are right now.

I would not recommend anger mowing.

Later, I told him that he is to be buried in that coca cola cooler when his time comes.  I won’t tell you what else I said because it’s kind of gross.  We laughed, DDB called me mean, and all was forgiven.

But, I think it only fair he massage my neck and shoulders, after he and my son return from scouring the highway ditches for the lid. 

But seriously, does it not amaze you that this vintage piece managed to stay in one piece for so many years, and literally ten minutes in his possession, he’s ripped it apart?

Maybe I better get back on that mower a bit longer, my Yosemite Sam is getting riled again.

(edit) Not too long after I hit publish, our truck pulled up into the driveway, my Hunky came bearing gifts. He had found the other lid to the cooler on the opposite side of the road he had been driving. It didn’t even take much of a beating. Unlike my poor muscles. 

and my toothbrush

and my trash can with the Walmart bag liner

and my toilet paper

and can anyone spot the tag I’ve yet to cut off the chest on top of the shelves?

the one I bought three years ago.

What I really wanted to show you,
though I am uncertain why,
are my new green sunglasses.

That’s all.

Really.

I have nothing else to talk about today.

I’m sure I will be getting the notice any day from the Xanga team,
begging me to please close my account and move to WordPress.

I’ve been waiting for that notice for the last seven years,
but for whatever reasons, it’s yet to arrive.

They must take pity on this pathetic Wild Woman and cut me a lot of slack.

See why I need Xanga to continue.

Who would I show these stupid things to?

I’m pretty sure WP have regulations in place concerning open lidded toilets.

Really, I am.

Oh wait, don’t go yet….have you checked out the prizes in SaintVi’s drawing?

I’ve offered used footwear.

Seriously.

I know.

I’m pretty sure I could never offer used footwear for a drawing over at WP.

Xanga.

Where a wild woman can show off her toilet.

It don’t get no better than that. (and she can use her redneck talk)

(edit) Since some of you are crushing on my bathroom, here are pics from when it was actually decorated.  At the moment, everything is still packed up in boxes.

The dogs are all howling in unison.

Well, Sadie’s is more of a scream,
but she is giving it all she has,
that deep cry from the soul.

I adore these moments.

It’s the one way all nine of our neurotic and unique canine connect.

This is how I see Xanga.

Despite all of our backgrounds, we come together,
releasing all the glories from deep within.

It saddens me to think this gathering of beautiful peoples might cease to exist
under one single cyber sky.

I’m able to accept death in its time,
but I am not one to stand by and watch it happen.

I tend to get down on hands and knees
put mouth over mouth
and breath air into lifeless lungs.

It’s kind of scary to put ourselves into compromised positions,
questioning if it will really make a difference,
fear of being made a fool.

I don’t fear being made a fool, I do a good enough job of that on my own.

But, we never know if something can be saved, unless we try.

So many people told me and my Hunky that it was such a waste to adopt children.

And quite honestly, there were times when my soul was bleeding so profusely,
I was tempted to believe them.

My children’s wounds became my wounds.

Sometimes a soul is so weak,
we just invest
with no expectation of anything in return.

Because we love them.

Even if we don’t get the return we are hoping for,
fighting for something we believe in
develops that warrior inside of us.

It’s never wasted.

I stand here today,
a little shaken
a little stronger
with the love and acceptance of all nine of my children.

Lungs full of air and souls full of life.

I might be tempted to laugh in the faces of the naysayers,
but I won’t.

So, as for Wild Woman, she’s not ready to let loose of her Xanga West,
she’s willing to fight for her mangy varmints.
Her beautiful mangy varmints.

Slap her silly and call her a Stooge,
but she will be purchasing Six Year Long Xanga Blogging Memberships.
(one for WW and five mangy varmints she has already selected)

I mean sure, we can prepare ourselves for Xanga’s demise, but I feel the need to pull you all a little closer, under this same starry sky.

Care to throw your head back and howl with me?

For those who are interested, here is my facebook.
Just be sure to pm your xanga name, so I know you are not some lunatic trying to steal my chihuahuas.
They can only handle one lunatic in their lives, and I’ve got that base covered.

This is Luke’s Rock.

Obviously Luke has muscles.

Me thinks Luke should put those muscles to work
instead of tagging up nature.

Luke, you really should share your gift with the world
and not just the squirrels along the trails.

These folks here at Moore Recovers can help you get started.

Just think of all the other people that will see your beautiful flex
as you lift tornado debris and move through piles of rubble.

Spread the love, Luke.

Josey just stretched and released a sweet canine yawn while snoozing in one of the bedroom recliners.  These chairs were suppose to be for me and my Hunky, but the dogs have taken them over.  As it should be.

Meteorology Man is gone again today.  He is working with Victory Disaster Relief in Moore with more clean-up work.  He thanked me for having his work clothes already washed and ready to go.  It’s a simple thing.

He finally got his offer package for his new job yesterday.  Right when we are trying to find the drop-off location for the Snuggle Drive.  He had people calling him non-stop requesting information.  We had to pull over three times.  I finally asked him (read demanded) that he ignore all their pleas for more paperwork until after we had delivered the Snugglies.

We tried a new restaurant while we were in Edmond.  Ted’s.  The salsa was fresh, with the perfect hint of cilantro.  The hot stuff nearly closed my Hunky’s throat.  He seriously couldn’t breath.  It really should come with a warning label.  And because I am the compassionate wife, I made dieing from salsa jokes for the rest of the day.

I ran to the store this morning to pick up more dog food.  We will be delivering it to Absentee Shawnee Tribe Community Center for the Shawnee tornado victims.  We will also offer our three dog kennel runs.  And because we are closer, we can offer our ranch for lost horses.   We think we can swing a few dogs as well, if need be.  I have three open dog pens.  I will just need to pick up some more dog houses.

Well, Miss Joesy has fully awakened from her sweet canine slumber, and is bossing me with her growls and grit.  She is ready to rumble and carouse the out of doors. 

I listened to this song this morning.  Her spirit really shines through. 
THIS is Oklahoma.

If you would like a way to help Moore, Oklahoma, you can still order the Heart of Moore sculpture through PioneerArtisanworks. 

I just got out of the shower and will type a few words before my Hunky comes in to blow dry my hair for me.  I know, the man freaking rocks.  You know what else he did for me?  He removed a tick from my head.  Not for sure how it got there other than maybe when I was mowing under the trees the other day.  That means it’s been nesting in my hair for three days.  Small beans.

 

Cleaning up a cemetery so people can be buried, bigger beans.  That’s how my Hunky and two of our sons spent the day yesterday.  They were so moved by the amount of volunteers.  More than 1000 people showed up to help clear away all that debris.  There’s some heroes out there in this beautiful world.  Real heroes. 

Meteorology Man has his interview today. They decided to not fly him out since they already know him and just do it over the phone.  That’s allowed him the freedom to help with the disaster relief.  I love how that worked out.

After his interview, we will head to a Snuggle Drive to drop off these goodies.  The young lady who is organizing the drive wants every child who the tornado has left homeless to have something to snuggle.  Blankets, pillows, stuffed animals.  I love seeing young people get so involved.

Compassion.

I think I may be confusing survivor’s guilt with a deep rooted ability to identify with this type of tragedy. 

I don’t know, maybe it’s both.

Regardless,
I’ve declared it a good thing.

I’d rather feel what I am feeling, than not feel it.

Thank you for your encouraging words to me. 
It really helped to make things clear.

Now, it’s time for my hunky to work his magic on my hair.

The house is quiet, with the exception of a few birds outside my window. 
My heart is heavy, they encourage me to sing again.
But it’s hard.
After three years, I still struggle with survivor’s guilt.

I know it’s not rational.
It’s just so freaking hard to move on
when so many are staring at massive miles of rubble
asking, now what.

So you do what you can do.

You send a check.
You pack little baggies of toiletries.
You gather.

But, it will never be enough
to end this ache in my soul.

Meteorology Man and the boys left early this morning with shovels and chainsaws in hand.This is how the men folk cope. They rip into the piles of chaos, releasing what could not be released in tears.  They are heroes. Though they will never admit it.

Along with those who open their doors to strangers,
who care for the lost and wounded canines,
who ensure children have blankets and stuffed animals to make them feel safe again.

Those who bring a bottle of water,
a sandwich,
a hand to hold.

Who open their ranch gates to shaken horses,
loading their trailers with supplies from cities all over,
and making the trip to designated drop off centers.

Because when people are hurting,
something arises in us and we drop everything to do what we can.

I love that about people.

Macy wrote the words so beautifully.
She was feeling a bit helpless,
but found such a loving way to help raise funds for the victims.

They have created this metal sculpture of Oklahoma with the heart of Moore,
which can be purchased through the PioneerArtisanworks etsy site for $10.
All proceeds going to Victory Disaster Relief.

If you feel this is a way you can help the people of Moore, Oklahoma, I thank you. 

I also want to thank you for all of your kind words for my Oklahoma and her people.You is good peoples and I wish I could hold every single one of you in my arms.

Since I don’t do chainsaws, I am going to go cry a few more tears into the fur of my red dun mare.

I love you.

edit: OBL has a glorious post on survivor’s guilt.  I put my face into my hands and cried. And then I had this overwhelming sensation to eat fresh salsa.  That’s when I discovered my hands smell like cilantro.  My Oklahoma sun has finally returned today and I’ve been digging in my gardens. Good therapy doesn’t get any better than sun, digging in the dirt and the sweet words of a friend.  And fresh salsa.

I am sick.

Moore Oklahoma has been hit again. 

It’s beyond massive. 

At least two schools have been wiped out.

The children were still inside.

No reports yet on survivors.

Still waiting to hear from @bohemianlotus.

Storms are not due to hit our area for a couple hours, maybe less.

Please pray and send your sweet calming vibes towards Oklahoma’s chaos.

I love you.

UPDATE: All kids accounted for at Briarwood Elementary school in Moore, OK. Minor injuries reported at the school. www.news9.com

UPDATE 2: NBC News reports that 24 children are believed dead at Plaza Towers.

UPDATE 3: Macy, (my oldest daughter) is with bohemianlotus. She is safe, but without phone/power.  They drove by the area of her mother’s home and it looks to be leveled.  She still has been unable to locate/contact her mom. 

UPDATE 4: 51 confirmed dead in today’s tornado outbreak. www.news9.com

UPDATE 5: Macy just let us know that bohemianlotus was finally able to make contact with her mom, and Romeo is believed to be okay, too. 

UPDATE 6: Oklahoma State ME office at 11:54pm – death toll from Monday’s tornado outbreak is now 91 24.

UPDATE7: 101 people found alive overnight in the rubble.

UPDATE 8: Here’s an update from @bohemianlotus! She could use some xanga hugs.

Took a walk to the east pond a couple days ago. 

It feels good to roll around on the ground with Doc Holliday again.

Simmer down. 

Did you forget Doc is my camera?

sheesh peoples

So tell me, what pretties have you found lately?